The Wisdom in Restricting the Divorce to Three Times

Imam al-Rida (AS) was once asked the reason why a man is not allowed to remarry his divorcée numerous times unless she has married another husband first, to which he replied, ‘Verily Allah, Blessed and most High, has permitted revocable divorce twice, and said: “[Revocable] divorce may be only twice; then [let there be] either an honourable retention, or a kindly release” Quran 2:229, meaning the third time around. Because of his contracting this divorce that Allah despises so, three times over, Allah prohibits him from doing it again, so she [his divorcée is not lawful for him until she marries another husband [and he divorces her, in order that people do not plunge into divorce, taking it as a light matter, and in order that women may not be caused to suffer in the process.

Imam al-Rida (AS) said in a letter that he wrote to Muhammad Ibn Sinan outlining the reason for restricting the divorce to three times, ‘The reasoning behind the divorce being permissible three times is to do with the respite it gives [each party to think] between the first to the third time for in that time, a desire [for ones spouse may arise or ones rage may subside. Also, [it has been restricted to three in order to discipline and deter women from disobeying their husbands [time after time whereby she may have become deserving of separation and distancing for doing something to disobey her husband. The reason why a woman becomes unlawful for a man after nine counts of divorce, where he is absolutely not allowed a woman and is punishable for it, is in order that people do not make a jest of divorce and so that women are not abased, and so that man may consider his situation carefully and vigilantly [before plunging into marriage and divorce, and that he may feel despair at ever coming back together with a woman after having divorced nine times.